Wed, 03 Mar 2021 12:04:15 -0500

She Rose

“I was raised by a mother who taught me that I was complete all by myself.”

- Shaun Robinson

“It started with my mom telling me I deserved to be in any room and shouldn’t shrink myself to make someone else feel better about themselves.”

- Arlan Hamilton

I was raised by a legion of amazing, educated, inspiring, powerful, beautiful women. I. AM. BLESSED. Let’s be clear, I am not a statistic. I had an involved father and other men who served as mentors and role models all of my life. But, during those crucial formative years, it was the grace and guidance of my mother, grandmother, great grandmother, godmother, Aunt T, and aunties that shaped the person that I am today. Let’s pause for second in honor of that. I have been poured into by generations of Black women that saw in me what could be before I knew what was. It is incumbent upon me to pay homage to their lives and their legacies as I am a product and beneficiary of both.

We all have a mother or mama or mom or madre or moms or mamá or mommy or ma. Whatever name you use, there is a rich history of matriarchy in households of color. The strength, courage, knowledge, wisdom, and love that those women gave freely of themselves has made us stronger, better, and wiser ourselves. Even with that commonality, we live in a world and country that has historically relegated women to less. While there are still those who would prefer to see their women barefoot and pregnant, making homes and raising babies, they are neither our concern, nor our consideration. You are not theirs. Never should have been, never will be again.

“Never be limited by other people’s limited imaginations... If you adopt their attitudes, then the possibility won't exist because you'll have already shut it out ... You can hear other people's wisdom, but you've got to re-evaluate the world for yourself.”

- Dr. Mae C. Jemison

“You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.”

- Maya Angelou

Girls ROCK, Girls CODE, Girls RUN, Girls BUILD, Girls DO, Girls ARE, Girls CAN, Girls WILL.

That is all true and then some. As more people think it, more will say it, then more will act like it, then more will believe it, then more will know it, and then, finally, we won’t have to say it at all. It is not fair that you are seen as representative of your gender, or race, or ethnicity, or the intersections of all of the above. But you are, so REPRESENT. Here at UMBC, we preach grit. We also teach that grit is not a function of any of those self-same intersections. Your presence, persistence, and success are all evidence of your grit. Every time that you show up, as your whole self, and do your best, you show the world who you are and show yourself who you can become. Sometimes you won’t feel like you are enough. Sometimes you won’t feel awesome or amazing. Sometimes you may not feel cared about or loved. YOU ARE. Sometimes you won’t know what to do, or if you could do it even if you knew. Sometimes you won’t know if you can or even want to keep going. YOU CAN. Sometimes that light at the end of the tunnel seems way off in the distance, and never seems to get closer no matter how hard you work; you’ll never finish your degree, you’ll never get that job, you’ll never find your passion, you’ll never have that life. YOU WILL. You have been poured into by generations that proceed you whether from right down the street or from lands beyond the shores. The strength of their collective spirits infuses all that you are with all that you will need. You are your ancestors’ wildest dreams IRL. It is high time for you to live that dream if you haven’t started already.

“Don’t spend life daydreaming about ‘what could be’. Invest your energy in what is right in front of you and see how it can be cultivated into something meaningful.”

- Aisha Bowe

So what am I asking you to do?

1. Reach out to someone. Find a woman in your field that is amazing and reach out to her. Ask about her journey and her dreams. Find a safe and appropriate space/way to connect with a girl who may be interested in your field and tell her about your journey and your dreams.

2. Rethink the words you use. I catch myself saying “guys” all the time. It may seem subtle or silly but it isn’t. The more we learn about coded language and its impacts on others, the more we can work to create an environment where all can thrive.

3. Do your best. That means maximum effort. That is all. It may not mean a 4.0, or 99th percentile MCAT or GRE scores. It means that you give it all you’ve got and then get up and do it again the next day.

4. Take care of YOU. All work and no play will burn you out. Especially when your whole world is in a computer screen. As you go, take care of yourself in real and tangible ways. If you need help, get help. If you need help finding the help, just say something, we are here for you.

5. Take care of Business. You are here to get your degree. You have persevered through pandemic, campus closure, zoom, all of it. You may not be doing as well as you hoped you would, but you are still doing. Keep showing that Grit and get this done. The world needs to see the brilliance you have to offer.

“I raise up my voice—not so I can shout, but so that those without a voice can be heard.”

- Malala Yousafzai

"Freeing yourself was one thing, claiming ownership of that freed self was another."

- Toni Morrison

Thumbnail from MiraCosta College AAUW Women's History Month Flyer